things i want to say to my ex when he calls but don't have the balls guts to do so

1. please don't call me if you're not getting back together with me.
2. if you weren't my friend when i was going through a major crisis in my life, what makes you think i want to be your friend now.
3. no, i don't envision having sex with you (no matter how positively hott you are in my memory).
4. why do you call me at least once a week?
5. i don't give a flying fuck if you're flying to taipei today, that you'd be in clark until friday afternoon, that you're busy the entire weekend, and that you won't be able to call me until after my birthday.

but, hell, the fact that i remember every single thing he told me when he called again last night and am ranting about it right now just proves one thing:

AFFECTED!

moving on ...

it's my birthday soon (and ara's birthday tomorrow. go throw some love and alcohol her way) and i've only got two things on my tangible list:

1. a cordless phone; and
2. a cd of orange and lemons.

on the other hand, my non-tangible list is definitely longer and i don't think i have enough credits in my pre-paid internet card to type it all out.

this year's birthday will be so like the birthdays of year past (age 24: chicken pox; age 25: break-up; age 26: disastrous birthday party; age 27: gym outfit pretending to be a birthday gift; age 28: boyfriend basically forgot it was my birthday): probably disastrous, especially since my family is away. but my birthday will also be different: i'm single for the first time in years. i don't know what next thursday has got in store for me but i do know that i am going to work, bringing food to feed people at work, and will most likely spend dinner with my aunt. i am however keeping my fingers crossed that one of my best buds get the go sign to bring me with him to their team building thing over at quezon where i'll have a weekend that promises me enough beer to make me forget that i am turning 29 and that the bar results are due out soon.

speaking of the bar examination, if and when i fail, promise to continue loving me, promise to continue praying for me, and promise to force me to study, study, study, and study until i hit your head with a thick reviewer. if and when i pass, i, in turn, promise to take in one case from all of you for free.