Wednesday, May 31, 2006

there are a lot of things i can give up to lose weight.

and, in the interest of catching the eye of my new crush, i'm basically willing to give up a lot of things food-wise.

i thought it was going to be easy. after all, what's a cup of rice compared to the possibility of life-long happiness?

however after i discovered big scoop mint chocolate chip ice cream, i realized it wasn't going to be that easy.

and, after i consumed the entire half gallon in five days, i had to tell myself - and telepathically, my crush - that if he can't love like me extra poundage and all, then maybe, it's just not meant to be.

Monday, May 29, 2006

how low can i go?

quite low.

this afternoon, as i was waiting for the traffic light to turn green at the corner of adriatico and quirino, a street kid stuck her tongue out at me after i refused to give her anything. my reaction? i stuck my tongue out too.

wacky told me that there's a little bit of good in every one of us. with almost no sleep, a major need to go to the bathroom, and an exhaustion i can't shake off, what little good there is in me has virtually disappeared.

Friday, May 26, 2006

must. not. shop.

as if.

barely a week after i wrote in ink my resolutions for the rest of the year - topbilled by the proclamation that i will not shop anymore - i found myself trying on shoes at sari-sari and left the mall with two pairs of round-toe flats. i told myself that at P150/pair, it would be a sin not to buy.

but then with five days to go before salary day and with so little money in my wallet, i feel a twinge of regret having parted with my precious three hundred bucks. but then again, one look at the pretty pairs of shoes coupled with the knowledge that i paid a little more than what i would have paid for a meal at mcdonald's makes me feel all good and fuzzy inside.

and at the end of the day, i say, it's just money. money can be earned, money can't be brought to heaven, and money can be taken away. but that warm and fuzzy feeling one gets with a new pair of shoes, well, that's forever.

at least for me.

Wednesday, May 24, 2006

i hate veevee with a passion.

because who else would be lucky enough to go through 27 (28? gaaah. i can't remember anymore!) years of her life without anyone flirting with her and then wake up one day, go to work, and then have my favorite pop/matinee idol flirt with her?

only veevee.

but then how can i hate veevee if veevee was nice enough to go with me to the ultimate mothership: SM MALL OF ASIA.

it was huge, so huge that even my internal mall radar was most of the time "lost" inside the mall. the maps inside the mall didn't help one bit either. you just walk and walk and walk and pray you don't get lost.

i loved it and notwithstanding all the "it's all gonna fall down" rumors, veevee and i watched x-men iii there (the movie was amazing!) and hopefully, one day, we'll find ourselves there and have the stamina (and the patience) to go through each and every store, try out each and every food stall, and finally, map out the place in our heads so we don't get lost anymore.

Monday, May 22, 2006

my boss has done more than enough to inspire my utmost respect, loyalty, and admiration.

but today, she did something that will make me willingly take on all the resolutions she'd throw my way for the next ten thousand years: she gave me a lovely pair of once-used two-toned via spiga pumps.
growing up, it's always just been my mom, my brother and me (my dad worked abroad for the longest time before he and my mom migrated to the US) and after my brother left home last december, i've had the entire house to myself. after a couple of days being scared of my own shadow, and another couple of days envisioning myself waking up drenched in blood like those victims in forensics shows on crime suspense (i have a flair for the melodramatic), i got used to the idea and realized that hey, it isn't so bad at all.

wait. i didn't just get used to the idea, i loved the idea of living alone so much that i'm planning a move to sta. rosa - a place where there aren't two SM malls within a five kilometer radius - come october.

anyway, i've spent the entire weekend in my aunt's house in quezon city and it's pretty cool waking up to a room with two other people in it, to come down and greet people good morning, and to hang out with kids (2nd year high school, incoming sophomore in college, and an incoming freshman who keeps reminding me that he's entering the best private university - the Ateneo) who think i rock in spite of the fact that i don't know the difference between house and lounge music. i just love it here and to use my dad's words, "parang ayaw mo nang umuwi."

i guess the forced isolation - partly resulting from the need to buckle down and study and partly resulting from the fact that i don't really like going out - has taken its toll on me. i may not have gone through as much of commercial law as i would like to (nego, after all these years is still a fucker imho) but just being around people you not only love but genuinely like as well has this way of rejuvenating you like no shopping trip can.

speaking of shopping trips (what a messy post, i know), i have pledged to cut off all shopping trips in the immediate future. 29, i realized, is too old not to have a huge stockpile of money in the bank. funny how i used to be more financially stable when i had just started working, and how, after i got spike almost three years ago, i'm just using it as an excuse why i am perennially broke. i'm making way more money than i used to (contrary to popular opinion, the salary of a teacher in that little school in the middle of ortigas is not directly proportional to the tuition fee they charge the students) but i don't seem to be getting any richer. in fact, "broke" seems to be the more appropriate term.

gaaah. i'm just channeling my aunt's mantra. she tells me, don't say you're broke, say you 'don't have the budget for it'. so okay, i haven't had the budget for anything recently. thank god i don't have a credit card. otherwise, i'd be one of those who'd be receiving regular calls from citibank asking me to pay my credit card bill.

another digression - what is it with those people who call for citibank? they're as bad as those people in white shirts and green pants in malls who stalk you and ask you if you have a credit card so they can sell you something. family first i think. gaaaaah. there's this guy who used to work for the court whose number just happened to be the number we're using right now. every single day, a telebanker would call asking for him. that's been going on for a year now, notwithstanding the fact that we've been telling them every single day for a year now too that he doesn't work there anymore. we've resorted to explaining it to them nicely, explaining it to them rudely, and recently, to threatening them, all to no avail. crazy really. next time i get to be the one to pick up the phone, i'm going to either (1) give them my ex's house number (hit two birds with one stone, he he) or (2) follow gay's advice and ask the name of their legal counsel and tell them we'll be filing an injunction to make them stop calling (not that THAT would be possible but it just sounds really impressive and lawyerly, neither of which come naturally to me).

oh well.

too long a post, with no real point. have a great monday everyone.

Sunday, May 21, 2006

it's the middle of the night here and while i know i ought to make use of my inability to sleep to good use - like studying - i am not.

maybe it's cause (1) i lost a whole lot of money trading in my three month old phone for a phone that i realized i actually wanted two days after i bought aforementioned phone; (2) i realized that the phone that i salivated over, saved up for, and finally bought for what i thought was a good deal turned out to be defective in little ways which i just found out as i was trying to trade it in for a good price; (3) i finally got the phone i really wanted which turned out to be just a pretty shell for a basically feature-less phone but i love it nonetheless; and (4) i lost a whole lot of people's numbers.

what makes it worse is that i seem to have lost the numbers of people who are significant: my bestest friends, people i love online, people i work with, people from my community and my AG, and people i need. ironically, the sim card kept numbers of people who i haven't spoken to in ages (not to mention those i have no plans of speaking to ever again).

so if you're reading this and you're ara, pam, or christie, well i don't have your numbers anymore. please text me.

and if i happen to have called you pondscum once, i don't have your number either.

and crazyboy, your phone number has met the same fate too.

in fact, if you love me and you've got my name in your phone book, do spend that peso for me and send me a text message. most likely, i'd lost your number too.

Saturday, May 20, 2006

it's over. i have officially turned into one of those friendster stalkers.

in my past life, i will admit to having googled my crushes. but i have never EVER used friendster to stalk anyone.

heck, i think i can count with the fingers of one hand the number of people i've invited to be my friends in friendster.

that being said, i will now admit that after eons of ignoring my friendster account i logged on today and, well, searched for my ultimate-i-am-so-in-major-crush-i-might-marry-him-in-a-heartbeat-if-he-asked crush on friendster.

and while his picture didn't really depict him in all of his HOTT glory (not that his hotness was one of my considerations when i fell in major like with him), i did learn that:

1. we're both pisces.
2. he's a year younger than me.

ok, that's not really enough to go on but, come on. he's only got four testimonials (not like mine is rocking with 11 in them, most of them from students who probably just wanted a good grade for that semester) and i didn't really learn anything from those.

and who cares.

when he did that shoulder tap thing lingkod members do when they greet each other when i came into the room this evening - doing it even though i was late and worship had already started - and chatting a bit with me during fellowship, i was just about ready to melt like, well, ice cream on a hot day.

corny, yes. aptly conveys how i felt, yes, yes, yes.


if this isn't pathetic high school crush, and totally inappropriate for my age, i don't know what is.

on a brighter (and more rational) note ...

there was a pair of shoes that i've been wanting for a year and i saw them on sale during lent - remember, that time when i gave up shoes for 40 days? anyway, we went to robinson's for lunch today with our boss and they still had the shoes on sale (that's god rewarding me for a sacrifice) and they had it in my size so guess who came home with it?


(wait. the more accurate version of the story would be who came home with three pairs of shoes bought within five minutes of each other? uhm, me.)

and here's something i realized over the weekend

who would have thought that buying matching luggage would make me feel like an adult?

forget the fact that i'm not going to bangkok with my family this july (my bad) and forget the fact that the farthest my luggage will be going in the near future would be quezon city. i am now the proud owner of my own set of luggage and i feel good about it.

Wednesday, May 17, 2006

Reason #5,643,298 why “she” beats Flourshit on any given day*

When I received that registry notice from the post office, I thought it was either of two things: (1) my crazy uncle used registered mail instead of normal mail, contrary to my instructions or (2) the Supreme Court, which happens to be spitting distance from where I work, mailed the bar results and because of the embarrassing confidential nature of the grades, opted to use registered mail instead of normal mail. Either way, it means that I’d have to hustle my ass over to the Las Pinas Post Office which just happens to keep the same office hours as my workplace.

Great. Just great.

However, my boss chose this day to leave early which meant it was the perfect time for me to leave early too and find myself in the parcel section of the post office. And contrary to my expectations, the package wasn’t from my uncle nor was it from the Supreme Court. It was from “her”.

Now being the girl who tries to find me a copy of Memoirs of a Geisha without Zhang Ziyi on the cover isn’t the kind who’d send an ordinary package so imagine the custom official’s face when she slit open the package and found a package wrapped in pink wrapping tissue with a pretty ribbon tied around it. Unsatisfied, the girl poked the ends open and started checking the contents.

“Chocolate, ata,” she muttered to her assistant. She then pulls out a small yellow plastic box, “At paperclips.” After almost five minutes of trying to figure out the other contents of the package (and also probably trying to figure out why anyone would send paperclips halfway across the world), she gave her okay and the package was finally handed over to me.

Eschewing the pretty pink package in lieu of the card that the customs person ignored, I did not only learn that my pretty pink package contained things that can get this now-lazy, very tired, and very stressed out government employee through another couple months of studying, but I also learned what each of the special things she included inside meant: Lindt chocolates, for all the happy hormones that they can kick in; pretty stick-on note pads, for all the tiny notes that I’d write myself while studying (including one that will say, “puta, rox, you’re a week behind your study schedule already!”); a bright yellow box containing six different types of yellow paper clips (and not one looks like the standard issue paper clips you get at work), for keeping my stuff together; and a tiny tin of “make-out mints”, if and when the time comes for me to make out with the boy of my dreams.

Mwah. Mwah. Mwah.

My dear ex-future-sister-in-law,

From the first time you sent me that cute Gap Christmas package, you’ve already wowed me not only with your presents, but with your thoughtfulness. My brother has always been worried that my weak spot for lovely presents will cause me a whole lot of trouble once I begin working for the government, but so far, I’ve been keeping my nose clean.

Thank you for being the best bar-exam-cheerleader in the North America. Let me just say that if not for your surprise present, I may not have gotten through the hundred or so pages I was able to finish tonight.

See you in July!

*not that Flourshit ever had a fighting chance!

Saturday, May 06, 2006

a new crush + a new house + vacation time

not bad, huh?

while the rest of manila is planning their own bora escapades, i'm happy to be seven hours away from a trip to baguio. technically, it'll be work since i'll be with my officemates and my boss for our court of appeals baguio session but who really cares. baguio, for me, still means THE summer capital (how positively 80's)and possibly the only reason why i was able to go through jurado the way i did the last couple of days.

in a couple of months, i'll also be transferring to a new house. it's not really a new house since my mom bought it almost seven years ago. but, no one's lived there yet, and i have her blessing (and her bank account) to fix the house up any way i want. right now, i'm thinking of shabby chic (nice white, fat couches) for the common areas. either that, or the day bed/kalesa bed that seems to be all the rage these days. bahala na. i'll get there. what i do know for sure is that i want the living room to have a nice, powerful split-type airconditioner.

new crush is a bit more than a crush and vanessa, if we met up today, you'd have heard all there is to know about him. for the meantime, let's just put it this way. he's such a huge deal in my heart and mind right now that not even the pat the pilot's recent phone call was able to faze me.

this'll be all for now. creativity, or whatever it is that i had going for me the last couple of years i was writing here, seems to have escaped me. i can't even come up with a decent post (god knows i've tried).
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