i make wishes, a lot of them.

i wish for jimmy choo shoes and narrower feet. i wish i had dainty toenails instead of the weird ones i have. i wish my hair would be shampoo-commercial worthy and that i find "dawn" the only bading who did no wrong to my hair.

but they're wishes and wishes like the ones i make rarely come true, especially since i don't have a fairy godmother.

still, sometimes, i get odd wishes coming true.

for example, way back in 2001, in my second semester in law school, i wished for a break. i wished for a break where i can sleep all day for a week and not feel guilty about it.

true enough, i got it.

one week, slept all i could without feeling guilty. the only thing was that it came in the form of chicken pox.

almost a month ago, in the middle of a three-hour traffic with the special birthday cupcakes i got for the pilot near melting point already and my nerves frayed like anything, i wished for things around me to just stop being difficult. i wished that either my masters degree just finished itself or that my work just get a wee bit lighter, or that law school become less of a burden. i wished that i don't break down, not when law school has almost ended, but that i see things through.

last week, my boss called me to her office, and she told me that i can forget about my thesis.

i nearly choked.

i've always been afraid of the consequences. me having to pay for what they spent on me as a scholar, me losing my job, me being a failure.

except that it turned out i didn't have to worry about anything, except the fact that i'll never get to add M.A. after my name. i'm being set free. the only thing they ask of me is that i fix everything before i leave in march.

and that i consider their offer to teach this summer.

god works in mysterious ways. but he does work.

and sometimes, that's all one needs to keep the faith.