someone spoiled my good weekend by making a huge dent on spike's right front bumper. i was groggy from having fallen asleep while watching the matrix revolutions. jay and i were still planning on getting coffee but at my state, he gently suggested that it would be so much better if we both just went home.

apparently, the parking gods had something else planned for us. when we got to the car, the guards swarmed around us and pointed something that -- given the lack of adequate lighting and my very sleepy state -- wasn't very obvious.

spike had a huge dent on his bumper.

now, this was really ironic.

for one, i RARELY park rear first, except that he has been telling me how it shouldn't be a waterloo for me cause it's just really really easy to do. this was one of the few times i parked rear first.

second, we weren't really supposed to watch in town center, except that it was so damn hard to get tickets for saturday night's screening at any of the makati theaters so i just decided to watch in alabang.

third, it's usually jay who brings a car when we're together, except that since he picked me up from the house, he left his license with the guard over at the other gate. also, he had driven from nueva ecija just that morning, then around ongpin to run some errands, then through the saturday afternoon traffic just to get to my house so he asked if i could be the one to drive this time around.

fourth, when i parked, jay asked me to fix the car so that one, it wasn't sticking out, and two, i was nearer the parked car beside me than the empty space on my other side.

fifth, after we had dinner, i was thinking of moving the car to a different parking spot, one that would be nearer the theater right. but i quickly killed the idea cause it would just be a waste of good gas.

i'm just feeling really hateful about it. when i saw her, i was ready to grab a handful of her hair and shake her to bits. the parking lot was HUGE and there were so many parking slots available. if she didn't have what it takes to park a car properly, why did she even attempt to park her car? or, why did she even bring a car in the first place? she just had this huge goofy face, totally devoid of any -- what would be the proper word for it, remorse? -- over what she had done. she just kept saying sorry over and over and over but her sorry wouldn't fix the dent.

her sorry wouldn't bring back spike to his pristine condition.

her sorry can't give me a car to drive on the days when he'd be stuck in the casa.

her sorry can't bring back the time i'll be losing fixing this.

her sorry can't erase the worry lines the accident caused.

so she can shove her sorry down her nicotine-laced throat and she can use her sorry to cough up the money to fix my car.

-oOo-

i know i'm being an ass for thinking all of these nasty, evil thoughts, on a sunday at that, when other people who have lost more (like sons and husbands over crazy bullet spray) can be more forgiving.