the pressure of boyfriend gift-giving

he's told me what he wants ...

a spiderman x-box controller.
an arm band for his i-pod mini.
nike stuff.

but to get him an x-box controller would mean more time playing with his toys, and i can't fathom spending P2,000 on what seems like a plastic attached to a garter. nike stuff, i can manage, but at the rate things are flying off the shelves just because it's christmas, i'm scared there won't be any left when i get there.

gawd. the pressure of boyfriend gift-giving. sometimes, it's so tough that you can't help but wish you can put your relationship on hold for the holidays.

i thought i was off to a good start when i got him a tiny christmas pillow (and a matching one for me) and presented it to him at the start of the holidays. however, it seemed i got stuck there ... and even though i spent a good 3 hours going through each store in shagri-la last thursday, all i had to show for it was one gift for him and, ehem, a gift for myself.

they say it's the thought that counts, but believe me, after having received a gym outfit from an ex-boyfriend for my birthday (who thought it was the greatest gift ever cause i finally coughed up money for a gym membership. he had forgotten the membership was to expire four days after my birthday and i haven't been back to the gym for more than 2 months). i tried expressing the appropriate reaction to the gift, i even slept with the gift beside me in bed, hoping i'd wake up appreciating the gift. i tried it on several times and i showed it to my roommate, brother, and friends. nothing. nada. zilch. i hated it. and i hate it still.

and so my quest continues. i've lined up two malls to visit tonight and i'm enlisting the help of my male officemate who i've always found to be cool and stylish (but not gay). i've got 4 days to go, and i'm running on holiday shopping adrenalin.

here's hoping that THAT shopping adrenalin doesn't lead me though to buy more gifts for myself.