the men that nobody wanted

when rosa was young and unjaded with life, she made a little list of things she wanted in a mate. he had to be tall and smart and interesting. he should have good genes (to have better children with) and come from a close-knit family. he should be able to engage in witty banter and someone who can sustain long and meaningful conversations deep into to night.

and he should not be over thirty. rosa figured that men over thirty, unless they went to med school, law school, or just lost a long-time girlfriend who either passed away, migrated, or turned into the ultimate b*tch overnight, are the proverbial crumbs, the dregs at the bottom of the coffee pot. they've been tried, tested, and discarded. other women didn't want them, so why should you?

so rosa had a great time dating men her age. some bloomed into wonderful meaningful relationships, some didn't, but it was all good. she also dated men older than her (but not older than thirty) and even when those didn't pan out, at least she came out a wiser and more gracious person than before.

one day, rosa was thrown by destiny to be roommates with a girl whose belief in life was that women over 25 who happen to be single are big-time losers. gasp, rosa thought, that would be me. rosa just ended a tumultuous two-year relationship and was feeling pretty much hateful of the world. she was tired of dating, tired of falling in love, tired pretty much of anything that involved men, but she didn't want to end up alone and single.

although rosa refused (adamantly, really) to subscribe to her roommate's philosophy, she began to doubt her marketability. yup, she wasn't getting any younger, and men her age, or older but under the 30-year-old cut-off, were either in relationships or weren't really looking. oh she had a totally dedicated and perfectly lovable guy chasing after her but she didn't really want him, much like in the same way you don't like eating the ulam at home... you don't like it cause, well, it's just there all the time.

so she went against the great age barrier and started dating men who were *gasp* older than 30.

the first one was really cool. he was a man of the world, had travelled extensively, and fit the checklist to a T. he was the one you could have long conversations into the night with (actually well into the morning, until you had to go to work and he could finally go to sleep) and actually go with you to a fun impromptu trip. but then he had other people on his rotation list and when rosa got rotated out, rosa tried to bow gracefully out of that and thought, well, at least i learned a lot from that guy.

the second one, introduced to her by a friend, was even cooler. although he was almost 9 years older than her, rosa could've sworn she found a soulmate. they enjoyed the same music, they enjoyed the same food, they enjoyed watching movies together (even if rosa was not a movie person to begin with), and they enjoyed each other's company. for a while there, it was all good, much like a bag of really sweet lanzones, but towards the end she bit into a sour one and things went into a screeching halt. so much with THAT older guy.

the third, and please hopefully the last one, was the guy who was good on paper. good family, established, educated, and seemed every bit the gentleman. the height difference was staggering, even in 3 1/2 inch heels, but as long as both of you remain seated, no one really notices that he's almost a foot taller. it was all good until rosa realized that one day all he wanted was to have fun (at 32? sheesh.) and more fun, and even if he did bowl her over with five dates in a row, she wasn't about to just have fun when fun involes the topic of a sugarfree song. no no no no no.

cosmo was right. mark was right. men that age have crossed the great barrier. they're over thirty, and single. they have resisted feminine wiles and devious women tricks to hook them. they can finally afford the luxury car. they can take out five women at a time and not be worried about their budget anymore. they're on to women, and for the first time in their life, they finally understand women. they're also a becoming a minority and the dating pool, as they get older, gets bigger and better.

so maybe rosa was wrong. they weren't the men nobody wanted.

they were the men everybody wanted.

and so the tables have been turned.