a friend told me that i gotta go make a christmas list and, being the materialistic person that i am, it didn't seem like a bad idea. i know i want tinted moisturizer, a nice toner, jimmy choo shoes, a pink-and-cream fino planner, and, well, more money in the bank. but then i realized the things i REALLY really want, no one can give me except me (or god via miracles).

i want to lose weight. i want straight hair. i want all my white hairs to fall off and be replaced with gorgeous hair in my natural color. i want the ability to wake up early without an alarm clock. i want hairless legs so i don't need laser treatments. i want whiter armpits. i want my pores to shrink. i want the ability to say "i don't need that" when am in the mall and i'm faced with a shoe on sale. i want eyebrows that have a natural arc. i want my eyes to be 20/20. i want my room to miraculously fix itself and stay fixed.

but am willing to live with fat, frizzy graying hair, alarm clocks, shaving/depilatories/more laser treatments, dark armpits, pores i have to hide, abject poverty, threading, contacts and eyeglasses, and a messy room if it means me passing the bar.