when it all ends too soon

I see a red door and I want it painted black
No colors anymore I want them to turn black
I see the girls walk by dressed in their summer clothes
I have to turn my head until my darkness goes
Hmm, hmm, hmm,...
I wanna see it painted, painted black
Black as night, black as coal
I wanna see the sun blotted out from the sky
I wanna see it painted, painted, painted, painted black

this is normal.
this is what crashing down after a high is like.
this is how sitting at home not being able to sleep, not being able to think, not being able to function feels like.

* * *

the only funny thing about today, i guess, is crying so hard i lost my contacts.

really.