today would've been my parents' 29th anniversary. instead of celebrating, they're probably sitting in their respective kitchens, sipping coffee, ignoring the fact that they're both alone, both somewhere between indifference and bitter disappointment, and both trying to forget that because of a section in the 1987 constitution and another one in the family code, they cannot legally divorce.
unlike other children of separated parents, i don't want them to get back together. they've had a difficult marriage, and i know they deserve the space that being several cities apart give them. one day, maybe they'll be friends again. or maybe not. what i wish them both though is that somehow, both of them find peace in the fact that together, they have raised a family, and maybe apart, they can teach their kids a thing or two about love.
at 27 and 28, my brother and i are both still single. i don't know if either of us will ever get married, but we've made a promise that if we're single and middle-aged, we'd get a nice condo and live together - my aunt wants to be with us too! - and make up for all the time that we bickered as kids.
at times, i believe in love. at times, because of what has happened to my parents who i once believed were madly passionate about each other, i don't. discussing my dream wedding with someone, i still believe, but after licking the wounds of a nasty break-up, i don't. good morning messages and long drawn-out goodbyes at night make me hope for love, but the reality brings me back to earth and tells me that there's no such thing.
i know there are more important things than love to think of right now, such as the short month between now and the start of the bar (thank god august has 31 days!). but as i was driving home tonight, with only a shopping bag on the passenger seat where i wish he could've been sitting, i realize that being the hopeless romantic that i am, love and its many permutations will always be on my mind.
my parents' marriage may not have worked, but at the end of the day, had it not been for that brief shining moment where they were majorly in love with each other, i would not be here writing this post. and that fact - according to a good friend - makes it all worth it.
Sunday, July 31, 2005
Saturday, July 30, 2005
i may not have been the most popular girl in the block, but i got my fair share of the attention. there were flowers, stuffed toys, balloons, cakes, perfumes, and once, a pencil from tokyo disneyland where, among all the girls in my class, i was the only one who got one topped with a "person". my bestfriend can explain what this means, but believe me, i later realized that yes, the difference apparently really meant something.
anyway, while the presents that exchanged hands have always been much appreciated, you know that guys do it just to please. they KNOW you want them and so they buy. at times, expense is not an option. they save, they scrimp, and they pull out all the stops just to see a smile on your face. and you do smile.
funny though how sometimes, the most unexpected thing in the world can make you smile a bit more wider. and so, while dangwa flowers on the hood of my car was kilig enough to make my classmate rib me and tease me about it for ten minutes at 6 in the morning and while i admit that bestest ex showing up on my doorstep with all my favorite stuff from mcdonald's still tops my list up to this day, i must say that a fifty-something driver handing you a much-abused pink and white bag containing three cartons of soupy snacks and a huge block of dark chocolate comes pretty close.
especially when inside the bag is a short note where the second to the last word is "heart".
p.s.
i must admit, dude, your driver is hott! *smirks*
p.p.s.
i don't usually do surveys, and haven't done one in a while, but i'm feeling particularly cheery today - must be from the snoupy snax, haha - and nikki tagged me and so here goes:
1. Nervous Habits:
~ i begin talking a lot, then say sorry and shut up.
2. Are you double jointed:
~ nope. teka lang, ano yun?
3. Can you roll your tongue:
~ i can!!!!
4. Can you raise one eyebrow:
~ it is an essential when you teach. do not underestimate the power of a single raised eyebrow when talking to a student who didn't read her homework.
5. Can you blow spit bubbles:
~ i can't, but i try.
6. Can you cross your eyes:
~ of course.
7. somebody deleted this...wonder why???
~huh?
8. Do you make your bed daily:
~ on good days, yes. on bad days, no. on days when i'm late, i do not only not make my bed, it's also got a ton of clothes on top of the sheets and pillows.
-- CLOTHES --
10. Which shoe goes on first:
~ well, i've got different shoes on different feet and the one which does not work with the outfit gets taken off.
11. Speaking of shoes, have you ever thrown one at anyone?
~ whoever i'll throw the shoe at will be so not worth the damage to my shoe.
12. On the average, how much money do you carry:
~ recently, i realized that so long as the car has gas i can survive with fifty bucks. unemployment can do that to you.
13. What jewelry do you wear 24/7:
~ earrings, and a watch.
14. Favorite piece of clothing:
~ the nude wonderbra my aunt gave me.
-- FOOD --
15. Do you twirl your spaghetti or cut it?
~ twirl
16. Have you ever eaten Spam:
~ recently no. but spam was part of the "refugee" stash my ex gave me and i remember eating nothing but it for a while.
17. Favorite ice cream flavor:
~ rocky road
18. How many cereals in your cabinet:
~ none... my brother ate it all up.
19. What's your favorite beverage:
~ cold water
20. What's your favorite restaurant:
~ alda's ... but i swear i'll never take another guy there (even if i mistakenly think again that he's "the one") for as long as i live. men and romantic love just ruin the place.
21 you cook:
~ yes, but don't ask me to make adobo cause i don't know how.
-- GROOMING --
22. How often do you brush your teeth:
~ twice :) according to something i read, that's more than enough.
23. Hair drying method:
~ sit in the car, open the window, and allow the dirty metro manila air to do the drying. it's gross i know, but i'd rather sleep that spend time drying hair.
24. Have you ever colored /highlighted your hair:
~ colored, highlighted, and everything else known to man. i pity my hair.
--MANNERS--
25. Do you swear:
~ recently, way too much. being on the phone at 3 in the morning does that to you.
26.Do you ever spit:
~ not at all, and its uncouth.
-- FAVORITE --
27. Animal
~ fish
28. Food:
~ ketchup fries, oreo mint and creme, apple, cheese, and ham sandwiches... tama na. baboy na.
29. Month:
~ march!
30. Day:
~ wednesday
31. Cartoon:
~ powerpuff girls
32. Shoe Brand:
~ i have: kate spade; i want: jimmy choo; i need right now: anything flat. my knees are killing me!
33. Subject in school:
~ economics. raj palacios a meter away from you is the best incentive in the entire planet. sir, if you're still out there, and single, i'm here, and i still want to marry you.
34. Color:
~ pink, even before it became chic, when it was just all about caladryl and barbie bags for pre-schoolers.
35. Sport:
~ uhm, is sleeping a sport? cause if it were, that would be it.
36. TV show:
~ CSI
37. Thing to do in the spring:
~ walang spring sa pinas.
38. Thing to do in the summer:
~ escape from students and sleep and not have to wake up to the alarm clock's blaring noise.
39. Thing to do in the fall?
~ kung may fall sa pinas, golly, it'll have to be wearing knee-high boots!
39. Thing to do in the winter?:
~ when i finally see snow, i'll tell you.
-- IN AND AROUND --
41. In the CD player:
~ i totally forgot about the cd player since the itrip arrived :)
42. Person you talk most on the phone with:
~ you know who you are
44. Do you regularly check yourself out in store windows with mirrors? honestly?
~ i actually don't like seeing my reflection. uy, dude, this is part of the 50%.
45. What color is your bedroom:
~ pink
46. Window seat or aisle:
~ window
-- LA LA LAND --
48. What's your sleeping position:
~ on my side with a pillow in front and a pillow wedged on my back pretending someone's spooning me. *sigh* it's sad being single.
49. Even in hot weather do you use a blanket:
~ not anymore.
51. Do you sleepwalk:
~ sleepdrive even. thank god for comprehensive insurance.
52. Do you talk in your sleep:
~ thank god no. otherwise i may never be able to take the bar on account of questionable morality. ehm, justice callejo, joke lang to.
53. Do you sleep with stuffed animals:
~ was allergic to them, thank god for puffalumps.
54. How about with the light on:
~ no, and god help the dorm roommate if she leaves the light on.
55. Do you fall asleep with the TV or radio on:
~ its more like i fall asleep with a book in my hands opened to the page i was reading when i dozed off. this happens all the time. remedial law can be very very boring.
56. Last interesting person you met:
~ Nikki but she'll have to give way when i finally meet that traffic enforcer along evacom who wears crushed velvet, skintight leatherette pants, and heeled men's boots at 7 in the morning.
anyway, while the presents that exchanged hands have always been much appreciated, you know that guys do it just to please. they KNOW you want them and so they buy. at times, expense is not an option. they save, they scrimp, and they pull out all the stops just to see a smile on your face. and you do smile.
funny though how sometimes, the most unexpected thing in the world can make you smile a bit more wider. and so, while dangwa flowers on the hood of my car was kilig enough to make my classmate rib me and tease me about it for ten minutes at 6 in the morning and while i admit that bestest ex showing up on my doorstep with all my favorite stuff from mcdonald's still tops my list up to this day, i must say that a fifty-something driver handing you a much-abused pink and white bag containing three cartons of soupy snacks and a huge block of dark chocolate comes pretty close.
especially when inside the bag is a short note where the second to the last word is "heart".
p.s.
i must admit, dude, your driver is hott! *smirks*
p.p.s.
i don't usually do surveys, and haven't done one in a while, but i'm feeling particularly cheery today - must be from the snoupy snax, haha - and nikki tagged me and so here goes:
1. Nervous Habits:
~ i begin talking a lot, then say sorry and shut up.
2. Are you double jointed:
~ nope. teka lang, ano yun?
3. Can you roll your tongue:
~ i can!!!!
4. Can you raise one eyebrow:
~ it is an essential when you teach. do not underestimate the power of a single raised eyebrow when talking to a student who didn't read her homework.
5. Can you blow spit bubbles:
~ i can't, but i try.
6. Can you cross your eyes:
~ of course.
7. somebody deleted this...wonder why???
~huh?
8. Do you make your bed daily:
~ on good days, yes. on bad days, no. on days when i'm late, i do not only not make my bed, it's also got a ton of clothes on top of the sheets and pillows.
-- CLOTHES --
10. Which shoe goes on first:
~ well, i've got different shoes on different feet and the one which does not work with the outfit gets taken off.
11. Speaking of shoes, have you ever thrown one at anyone?
~ whoever i'll throw the shoe at will be so not worth the damage to my shoe.
12. On the average, how much money do you carry:
~ recently, i realized that so long as the car has gas i can survive with fifty bucks. unemployment can do that to you.
13. What jewelry do you wear 24/7:
~ earrings, and a watch.
14. Favorite piece of clothing:
~ the nude wonderbra my aunt gave me.
-- FOOD --
15. Do you twirl your spaghetti or cut it?
~ twirl
16. Have you ever eaten Spam:
~ recently no. but spam was part of the "refugee" stash my ex gave me and i remember eating nothing but it for a while.
17. Favorite ice cream flavor:
~ rocky road
18. How many cereals in your cabinet:
~ none... my brother ate it all up.
19. What's your favorite beverage:
~ cold water
20. What's your favorite restaurant:
~ alda's ... but i swear i'll never take another guy there (even if i mistakenly think again that he's "the one") for as long as i live. men and romantic love just ruin the place.
21 you cook:
~ yes, but don't ask me to make adobo cause i don't know how.
-- GROOMING --
22. How often do you brush your teeth:
~ twice :) according to something i read, that's more than enough.
23. Hair drying method:
~ sit in the car, open the window, and allow the dirty metro manila air to do the drying. it's gross i know, but i'd rather sleep that spend time drying hair.
24. Have you ever colored /highlighted your hair:
~ colored, highlighted, and everything else known to man. i pity my hair.
--MANNERS--
25. Do you swear:
~ recently, way too much. being on the phone at 3 in the morning does that to you.
26.Do you ever spit:
~ not at all, and its uncouth.
-- FAVORITE --
27. Animal
~ fish
28. Food:
~ ketchup fries, oreo mint and creme, apple, cheese, and ham sandwiches... tama na. baboy na.
29. Month:
~ march!
30. Day:
~ wednesday
31. Cartoon:
~ powerpuff girls
32. Shoe Brand:
~ i have: kate spade; i want: jimmy choo; i need right now: anything flat. my knees are killing me!
33. Subject in school:
~ economics. raj palacios a meter away from you is the best incentive in the entire planet. sir, if you're still out there, and single, i'm here, and i still want to marry you.
34. Color:
~ pink, even before it became chic, when it was just all about caladryl and barbie bags for pre-schoolers.
35. Sport:
~ uhm, is sleeping a sport? cause if it were, that would be it.
36. TV show:
~ CSI
37. Thing to do in the spring:
~ walang spring sa pinas.
38. Thing to do in the summer:
~ escape from students and sleep and not have to wake up to the alarm clock's blaring noise.
39. Thing to do in the fall?
~ kung may fall sa pinas, golly, it'll have to be wearing knee-high boots!
39. Thing to do in the winter?:
~ when i finally see snow, i'll tell you.
-- IN AND AROUND --
41. In the CD player:
~ i totally forgot about the cd player since the itrip arrived :)
42. Person you talk most on the phone with:
~ you know who you are
44. Do you regularly check yourself out in store windows with mirrors? honestly?
~ i actually don't like seeing my reflection. uy, dude, this is part of the 50%.
45. What color is your bedroom:
~ pink
46. Window seat or aisle:
~ window
-- LA LA LAND --
48. What's your sleeping position:
~ on my side with a pillow in front and a pillow wedged on my back pretending someone's spooning me. *sigh* it's sad being single.
49. Even in hot weather do you use a blanket:
~ not anymore.
51. Do you sleepwalk:
~ sleepdrive even. thank god for comprehensive insurance.
52. Do you talk in your sleep:
~ thank god no. otherwise i may never be able to take the bar on account of questionable morality. ehm, justice callejo, joke lang to.
53. Do you sleep with stuffed animals:
~ was allergic to them, thank god for puffalumps.
54. How about with the light on:
~ no, and god help the dorm roommate if she leaves the light on.
55. Do you fall asleep with the TV or radio on:
~ its more like i fall asleep with a book in my hands opened to the page i was reading when i dozed off. this happens all the time. remedial law can be very very boring.
56. Last interesting person you met:
~ Nikki but she'll have to give way when i finally meet that traffic enforcer along evacom who wears crushed velvet, skintight leatherette pants, and heeled men's boots at 7 in the morning.
Sunday, July 24, 2005
this is anna, but i know her as christie.
christie, a.k.a., is my favorite cousin's wife. but two weeks ago she told me that my favorite cousin was mean to her by not letting her go to new york and i told her that since he's been mean, she can take over his place. and so christie is now my favorite cousin.
christie gave me my first authentic coach bag. christie was my first fino convert. christie and i spend hours - once in a while - talking about everything and anything under the sun, and was the first person i updated about this unusual pseudo date with a hot guy. i can't explain it exactly, but she knows exactly what that means.
anyway, ever since i got to hang out with her, i've been pretty thankful that my favorite cousin met this girl and had the good sense to marry her. she's pretty, she's smart, and she has every mark of being one of us.
she was the first person i told about the ipod mini from my dad, the person who stopped me from dialling pat's number when i wanted to share the news with him (how stupid and dumb, i know!), and the person who helped me pick out a name, and confirmed that, no, it wouldn't be stupid to name my ipod buffy to match spike.
anyway, being the coach-giving person that she is by nature, she decided that she'd give buffy some accessories, a graduation present, she said.
all i wanted was the adapter - that way i don't have to charge using my brother's laptop all the time.
and a case, she said, and i said ok.
but who knew the package would come with an itrip.
it took a while, but i finally got it to work in the car. and so, since every song that blares out of my radio is a song that i actually know, well, guess who's being creating quite a ruckus singing in the car all the time, complete with actions?
anyway, if you see a girl in a red car singing and dancing, that would be me. and it's all christie's fault.
maybe next time you can get me car tint. that way i can sing and dance without anyone knowing.
what do you think?
p.s. shoes will take two weeks to make, even wedding shoes with all the brouhaha on them. we're in business. you can come home with the design you want and stuff, and we can have them made. however, inasmuch as i'd like to sponsor ian's shoes too, i think i'd buy myself ferragamos first before i get him those, favorite cousin status notwithstanding.
Saturday, July 23, 2005
Sometimes, the laziest of days begin with the best of intentions. When I left the bar review yesterday at 6, leaving Ateneo without passing by the library for the first time in a week, I knew that all I needed was a Friday free from the usual I-will-force-myself-to-study routine and all will be well.
But then, who knew how powerful Harry Potter 6 could be? While I didn’t feel pressured to read thebook pdf file after it was emailed to me last Thursday, yesterday, the thought of reading Harry Potter while eating my Sour Cream and Onion Pringles seemed really good. Add to that the fact that it was drizzling and the thought of reading yet another page of tax was making me hurl and my night seemed all planned out.
I read and read until I was too tired and the words began floating in front of my eyes. Good job, I told myself. A hundred pages of Harry Potter should be enough to keep the addiction at bay. Tomorrow, I told myself, I’d see myself in the library at 9 and will be staying until it closes at 7. I’ll also attend the lectures in Poli (in spite of the sleeping bouts in between discussions) and Criminal Procedure. I’d be a good girl. With five weeks to go, the pressure was definitely on.
But I never thought that cold weather plus a tummy that seemed to wanted me to stay at home unless I wanted to embarrass myself kept me firmly stuck in the soft confines of my bed. In between trips to the bathroom (I blame the leftover fish crackers I ate in the car out of sheer desperation) and reading page after page of Harry, I had managed to skip an entire day of studying.
So, in less than 24 hours, I was able to plow through 476 pages of Harry, and some 20 pages of criminal procedure. I’ve got 4 ½ hours left of today. Maybe, just maybe, the guilt of reading fiction instead of my review books will keep me reading.
p.s.
consumer alert!
if by some reason you decide to buy the SM bonus cooked ham, don’t.
if you like mint and crème oreos but have always found them expensive, it’s buy one take one right now at SM Sucat.
F&T frozen siopao is good.
But then, who knew how powerful Harry Potter 6 could be? While I didn’t feel pressured to read the
I read and read until I was too tired and the words began floating in front of my eyes. Good job, I told myself. A hundred pages of Harry Potter should be enough to keep the addiction at bay. Tomorrow, I told myself, I’d see myself in the library at 9 and will be staying until it closes at 7. I’ll also attend the lectures in Poli (in spite of the sleeping bouts in between discussions) and Criminal Procedure. I’d be a good girl. With five weeks to go, the pressure was definitely on.
But I never thought that cold weather plus a tummy that seemed to wanted me to stay at home unless I wanted to embarrass myself kept me firmly stuck in the soft confines of my bed. In between trips to the bathroom (I blame the leftover fish crackers I ate in the car out of sheer desperation) and reading page after page of Harry, I had managed to skip an entire day of studying.
So, in less than 24 hours, I was able to plow through 476 pages of Harry, and some 20 pages of criminal procedure. I’ve got 4 ½ hours left of today. Maybe, just maybe, the guilt of reading fiction instead of my review books will keep me reading.
p.s.
consumer alert!
if by some reason you decide to buy the SM bonus cooked ham, don’t.
if you like mint and crème oreos but have always found them expensive, it’s buy one take one right now at SM Sucat.
F&T frozen siopao is good.
Wednesday, July 20, 2005
i now know how the hair is like in person (i had to check your old pictures to remember the "old hair" and i must admit i like the new one much better), and i saw how one of the seven sandals looks like (really cute), and i saw THE birthday gift (was really lovely).
thanks to both of us having cars which are "coding" on the same day and both of us having an inherently chatty nature, we were able to have a lovely breakfast in spite of it being seven in the morning. forget that one had her entire day ahead of her (that would be me) and the other was ending her long day, it was fun, it was nice, and it was something that i hope would happen again sometime soon :)
thanks to both of us having cars which are "coding" on the same day and both of us having an inherently chatty nature, we were able to have a lovely breakfast in spite of it being seven in the morning. forget that one had her entire day ahead of her (that would be me) and the other was ending her long day, it was fun, it was nice, and it was something that i hope would happen again sometime soon :)
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